By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
