i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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