i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
mondays should just be called national damage control day
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
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