whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
