Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
