it hurts more in the daytime
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
