butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
