you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Houston, we have a blender
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
