TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
