You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Randomize
