I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I'm at about main and main street
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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