I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
