so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
