Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
