Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Randomize
