I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
