Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
