Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
