Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Michael Bay diarrhea
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
