apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
