How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
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