eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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