You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
