these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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