She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
