I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
