The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Randomize
