I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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