Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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