I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
