would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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