I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
