hell yes lets make some ravioli
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Sext me about skeletons
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Randomize
