nut hugger
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
