So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
