So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Randomize
