I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
