Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
my poor anus
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
