Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
