if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
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