i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
