I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize