did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Dignity is for republicans.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
