She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
