Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize