oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
