It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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