Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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