im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
