I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize