I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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